How to Speak Condescending Hipster Douchebag Circa 2019

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that the Condescending Hipster Douchebag in possession of serviceable education, must be in want of showcasing his moral and intellectual superiority… With all due respect to Jane Austin and the beginning of PRIDE & PREJUDICE, you can’t open your car door in a parking lot these days without hitting another … More How to Speak Condescending Hipster Douchebag Circa 2019

Mistakes Were Made

One of my favorite cartoons comes from the pre-Simpsons Matt Groening circa the 1980’s. I came across it in Baltimore’s hipster publication, The City Paper. Interestingly, Matt Groening was not the first person to use the passive-voice construction as a deflection device with Mistakes were made. Ulysses S. Grant, Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, Chris … More Mistakes Were Made

The Dirt Diet

Kristopher is a tall, muscular, sharp-dressed man with great hair. At 22, the software engineer’s future is so bright he has to wear shades. In a smart tortoiseshell frame, of course. So early one morning last week, Kris stopped for coffee and bro-tein…er, protein at McDonald’s. It wasn’t quite dawn and the parking lot was … More The Dirt Diet