Ten Things I’ve Learned in 30 Years of Marriage

Thirty years ago today, I married a guy named Paul.

We’ve more than touched on every extreme (save our own deaths) in the wedding vows: sickness, health, richer, poorer, plus some other ones too.

1202-a-marriage-according-to-gods-word-ingressPhysical loss.

Challenges with employment.

Financial chaos.

Death of all of our parents.

Disappointment around many a corner.

We also have laughed through the years and enjoyed prosperity, a return to health, appreciation for those who came before us.

Plus we’ve got three sons. There is no more thrilling roller-coaster ride than raising kids. Sometimes they make you turn green and vomit. Other times they make you proud and exhilarated.

And so here are ten things I’ve learned the hard way in 30 years of marriage:

10. Choose to say “I do” every morning. This means doing little things to make your spouse’s life better.

9.   The advice: Don’t let the sun go down on your anger is harder than it sounds, but things always look better in the morning. 

8.   Practicing forgiveness means STOP BEATING A DEAD HORSE. Don’t throw things back in your lover’s face.

7.   No man is poor who has children. However, it is unlikely he is rich either. Be okay with that.

6.   Never speak ill of your spouse to others. He is your better half. See him this way and it will be so.

5.  When the going gets rough, turn to God. A cord of three strands is not easily broken.

4.   Don’t let the kids divide and conquer. Be on the same page as your spouse with all decisions pertaining to the kids.

3.   If you are known to drink and then argue, don’t keep a gun in the house. This will save you years in the penitentiary.

2.   Your friends and neighbors may have more money, better toys, vacations to exotic locales, but you have a spouse who is not a douchebag.

1. Say “Yes” to the mess. Parenting is not for the faint-of-heart. Neither is marriage.


Thanks for stopping by!


Susan J. Anderson

Foxy Writer Chick

8 thoughts on “Ten Things I’ve Learned in 30 Years of Marriage

  1. Happy
    30th Anniversary! Wise words from a woman who truly has seen better and worse. Here’s to the next 30 years! May they be full of very special memories!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yep. After 36 years what you say is truth. However we don’t drink and have never owned any guns so that one doesn’t apply. It did however pique my curiosity! I think being able to laugh together is something akin to glue in a marriage…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Happy Anniversary my friend. I am on marriage #2 and Jackie #3. I was divorced from my first wife after only 7 years. We both should never have married but the good outcome of that union was our daughter (42 this month). Jackie and I will be married 12 years this September. It too, has had shares of ups and downs but we face them together. I married my best friend and am happy/proud to say so. Thanks for sharing your list and as a member of the male and married population, I am glad we are there for your amusement (smile).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. AAhhh. There’s so much to like in your comment–Happy Birthday to your daughter and Happy Early Anniversary to you and Jackie. Your stories about your adventures together crack me up! You got a good wife in Jackie and she definitely got a good husband in you. Praying God continues to bless you both with many more years of love and laughter.

      Liked by 1 person

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