We waited years to sell a house we never liked. Thankfully, three noteworthy events intersected last summer: our youngest graduated high school, our middle and oldest sons moved into their own respective apartments, and the economy bounced back from a decade-plus of real estate dregs. No one had to ask us twice. We grabbed paint … More Taxes, Death and Moving
One of my favorite cartoons comes from the pre-Simpsons Matt Groening circa the 1980’s. I came across it in Baltimore’s hipster publication, The City Paper. Interestingly, Matt Groening was not the first person to use the passive-voice construction as a deflection device with Mistakes were made. Ulysses S. Grant, Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, Chris … More Mistakes Were Made
There’s a laundry detergent commercial airing all over the place in which a mom and dad are folding a mountain of laundry because their adult children and in-laws have moved in with them. Dad holds up a rather large pair of underpants with a look of horror on his face. Mom snatches the giant granny-panties … More Red Bikini Underwear
A few years back, Jeff Foxworthy captured our imaginations with a shtick that used this simple formula–If you do X, you might be Y: “If you’ve ever belched the words ‘not guilty,’ you might be a redneck.” “If you’ve ever inflated an air mattress with a leaf blower, you might be a redneck.” “If you’ve … More You Might Be a Cultural Christian if…
There was trouble at the Walmart cheese case. Debating the merits of shredded cheddar vs. shredded Colby Jack, I stood momentarily transfixed and no more than eight inches away from the edge of the refrigerated display.